Welcome to Money As If, the free on-demand water that comes with your $500 VIP tour of Universal Studios on a 90-degree day. Today's rides:

— Jeanine

So, yes, I took my adult trip to Orlando, Florida, a few weeks ago, which included visits to Epcot, Disney Springs, and all three Universal Studios theme parks. It … wasn't cheap, and, for sure, the ticket prices were eye-popping, even without some conscious decisions on my part to splurge.

I mean, $185.31 (includes the tax) to visit EPCOT certainly feels wild when you're buying a ticket from your New Jersey living room.

But then, I dunno, you get to the park and realize that there's simply no shortage of people paying for admission — adults with kids, adults with no kids, men, women, old, young, practically still teenage; seriously, no one should be trying to pin high park prices on one demographic, WE ARE ALL TO BLAME! So, call it the trappings of capitalism (or whatever), but I can't say I felt cheated.

It could be that I knew what I was in for, which might work for Disney and Universal in general. You can't really take one of these trips without at least some pre-planning, given the high ticket prices, the litany of ancillary charges (transportation, parking, in-park dining, etc.), and the equally endless ways to "package and save" on all of the above.

(Did you know that, depending on your family's size, it could be cheaper to book a night at — but not necessarily stay in — one of Universal's premium hotels to get two days' worth of express passes than to pay for said passes individually? I mean, 🤯.)

I didn't spend too much time going down the cost-saving rabbit hole ahead of my trip. Most Orlando-centric savings tidbits I'm sharing here came later, semi-unprompted, after social media got hip to my interest in theme parks.

Candidly, I don't like to think about money while on or after a vacation. Sounds awful and bougie, I know, but it's also a protective measure. If I have to think about money on or after a vacation, IMHO, I can't actually afford to go take one, and so will abandon ship.

Of course, that doesn't mean I don't leverage certain strategies to make vacations actually affordable — and this particular trip was made entirely possible by some effective cost aversions, let's say.

I will sing the virtues of the "right" airline or hotel credit card and loyalty program until the cows come home. "Right" in this scenario means a carrier or chain you can (and will) easily patronize again and again, preferably at least once per year.

For me, that carrier is United, which runs a hub out of nearby Newark airport, and that hotel chain is Marriott, which owns my favorite resort in Aruba, though, honestly, any large-scale global brand you happen to like will do.

We don't travel all that often (this was my first vacation in close to two years), but we put a lot of our everyday spending on these cards (and pay the bills religiously in full each month), so I was able to fund pretty much my entire round-trip business-class airfare with banked miles and a well-timed promotional discount.

I didn't have enough Marriott Bonvoy points to cover the full stay at the hotel. (You can buy points to cover the difference, but unless it's very, very small denominations — and even then — it's generally not worth it. You wind up paying more for the points than you would for the room.)

Fortunately, at $189 a night (which amounted to $1,252 for the stay, after tax, resort fees, and a few food charges), the room, a studio villa at the Marriott Grande Vista (would recommend!), wasn't all that expensive. Plus, I left with more than enough points to fund my stay, whenever that may be.

Considering I was "saving" so much on flight and hotel accommodations, I decided to splurge on a VIP Experience at Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure (#JeanineMath). This was … an investment.

The VIP Experience costs me $360 on top of standard park admission. (Prices for both vary by day and time you buy.) The graphic below is a bit confusing because it includes a bundled two-day park pass, so I could also visit Epic Universe, but, essentially, yes, it costs close to $800 to spend two days at the three Universal theme parks.

Two things in my defense: First, I actually spent closer to $600 because I put the tickets on my brand-new Universal Rewards Visa Signature® Card, which charges no annual fee but comes with a $200 credit after your first purchase as a welcome bonus. (Credit cards are really great spending tools if you can avoid using them for evil running up bills you can't pay back.)

Second, the VIP experience, which included breakfast, lunch, all-you-can-drink water, guided front-of-the-line access to most major attractions, and an all-day express pass for before or after the tour ends, was totally worth it, especially after my first day at Epcot reminded me how much I like theme parks, but hate heat and waiting in lines.

Granted, I was traveling solo. The math definitely changes if you're trying to VIP your whole family, but if you can comfortably afford it or do wind up going single rider, it's definitely something to consider.

About theme park travel in particular:

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I know, I know, I said Money As If would be back in action last week, but I forgot about a little thing known as Memorial Day weekend, and, candidly, writing an issue for a holiday weekend always makes me a little sad, because only a small fraction of the audience is around to read them, so I had to belatedly change course. Apologies all around!

To that end, I'll be publishing super-sized (!) a bit intermittently this summer — likely every other Friday, with some adjustments for other summer holidays or personal time off. That'll help to ensure that no one misses the good stuff over the busy summer months and allow me to focus on some Money As If growth and revamp initiatives I’ve been too time-poor to tackle for a while now. Will resume our regularly scheduled (and enhanced!) program once the new school year begins.

For now, see you in two weeks!

Nowadays, most financial takes are boilerplate. These aren't.

And, finally, today, in things I have accidentally bought when trying to buy things …

Of all the inflated prices I encountered while in Orlando (and, yes, I was pretty much surrounded by them), none made my eyes pop nearly (nearly!) as wide as the one quoted to me by the cashier at my hotel's gift shop as I hurriedly purchased this freaking $5 bottle of Life WTR (?) before my Lyft arrived to take me to Epcot.

I paid that price because I was rushing, assumed the other water cost just as much, and figured I was essentially a captive audience. Well, joke’s on me, I guess, because, turns out, happily (?), that the Aquafina bottles just to the right were 3 for $9.

Fool me once …

Got questions, comments, receipts, tips, thirst traps, etc. you’d like to share? Send them to [email protected].

_{This article is for educational purposes only. We don’t recommend or advise individuals to buy, not buy, sell, or not sell particular investments or other assets, as everyone’s circumstances are different. Also, it’s your money and ultimately up to you to decide the best use for it.}